This Is Only a Test... Or Is It?

by Austin Brentley
austin.brentley@careertrainingdirectory.com
Career Training Directory Columnist

It’s late at night, and you are watching reruns of the Johnny Carson Show. “Man it was hot today… how hot was it?” When all of a sudden, the department of public safety broadcasts a public service announcement.

It administers some inexplicable, incomprehensible test during which your TV emits a really annoying noise followed by alternating vertical and horizontal lines on the TV screen. The test is over, the Johnny Carson Show returns, and you sigh with disappointment because you have missed the punch line.

The Department of Public Safety

What does it do exactly? Why all the hoopla during your favorite reruns? Did the test that just killed Johnny’s joke make you feel safer? Has the likelihood of some natural disaster, terrorist strike, or worldwide famine suddenly decreased? Do you personally feel more prepared in case of an emergency? How incredibly annoying.

The Alternative

Although the department of public safety often does some inconvenient and zany stuff, wouldn’t you rather live in a world of fire drills rather than in a world of fires? Whatever the department of public safety is doing, it must be doing a relatively good job, right? After all, when was the last time a volcano erupted and destroyed your house? When was the last time a herd of stampeding elephants tore through your front lawn? As long as you live in a world of relative peace, why not let the department of public safety run their little tests? Why not just let them interrupt a few reruns (all of which you have seen, by the way), if it makes them feel better, and keeps you a little bit safer?

The Time Will Come

Beware, however. A time will come when it will be more than just a test. A time will come when the department of public safety will interrupt your regularly scheduled programming to bring you urgent news. But until that time comes, just sit back and relax with good old Johnny.

About the Author

A freelance writer and researcher, Austin Brentley is an English teacher currently living and working in Yamaguchi, Japan.